I've been obese most of my life. I have a rather lopsided view of life because of it. Lopsided towards cynicism because that is what I have developed over years of taunts, abuse, neglect, rejection, & other stumbling blocks along the way. Instead of seeing the glass half-full or half-empty, I often see the glass and wonder "will I get blamed for the missing half since I'm fat?" I have met & seen obese persons (like myself) fall into 3 distinct groups - Accepted, Admitted, & Determined.
Those that accept their obesity feel that it is their lot in life and nothing can change it. These types have formed support groups to help nurture their own acceptance of their obesity & in some instances to force the public into accepting it as well (I think of the National Association for the Advancement of Fat People - the NAAFP, a real organization). Lobbying congress & businesses to recognize obesity as a disease with no cure. Other have built careers around their obesity and use it to gain acceptance from society (the two that come to mind are Ralphie May, winner of "Last Comic Standing" & Gabriel Iglesias who's first album was titled "I'm not fat, I'm fluffy"). I used to fall into this category. I learned early on to become either a bully or "the funny fat guy" because of my weight. I chose to be funny since I'm a lover, not a fighter.
There are those that admit to their obesity and know they need to do something about it. The trap is that they either go about it the wrong way or have done it in a half-assed fashion. I have met (and know a few) people that have had the surgery thinking they had been given the "magic bullet" of weightloss. Not following the life plan required after having the surgery. Losing hair, sallow skin, even gaining back the weight lost, all tragic & unfortunate fates for those that have admitted their need to lose weight. I think of celebrities such as Kirstie Alley & Ron (from "The Biggest Loser" Season 7), Kirstie lost her weight through Nutri-System but failed to stick with the program while Ron (even though now he has lost weight & kept it off) had the surgery years prior before it became a "safer" & homogenized operation & eventually reversed the procedure by stretching out the stomach pouch.I had upgraded to this group in high school when I joined Weight Watchers (dropped out shortly after because it was a room full of overweight moms) and later when I had my heart palpitations, turning to prescription medications to help with weight loss.
The last group is one that I intend on staying with. The Determined are on a quest to lose weight safely & properly. They understand that it will be a hard journey and that it will last the rest of their lives. The Determined many times have been a part of the other groups but one event in their life changed their status to "determined". Mine happened in an elevator several years ago. I had a revelation, an epiphany, everything I had learned about weightloss & about the surgery finally "clicked" with me. My life event was almost signing on the dotted line to have the surgery. I knew I had to change, but I was smart - I did my research. After processing the info & praying about my decision I realized that I would have to change my lifestyle regardless. Whether having the surgery or not, I would have to change the way I eat, exercise, & deal with stress differently. The Determined group is a small one as statistics show only 10% of those that lose large amounts of weight keep it off.
I have been a part of all three of these groups at one point in my life: I have accepted my role of "the funny fat guy" for a time, toyed with the notion of losing weight knowing that it is something I needed to do, but eventually I became determined to lose weight & keep it off. I aspire to become a 10 percenter, encouraging others to evaluate their lives & make their own decision to become determined to lose weight.
Here's to becoming a part of the 10%...
MattyV
www.iweighedmorethanjared.com
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